How to talk

"Pornography Harms

"How often should this subject be discussed with your partner/spouse? What are some ways to bring it up?

Have Any tips??"

 

This was posted on the Pornography Harms facebook page and I wanted to share my answer with you. I think I have talked about this before but I thought I'd talk about it just in case.

 

I think that it should be talked about as often as you feel. I think the topic comes up at least once a day in our house. Sometimes more. Due to my husbands addiction to pornography it is a conversation that we like to bring up quite a bit. I like to see how he is doing and if he has had a particularly hard day we have a discussion on what is bothering him, what started and so on. If we haven't talked about it in awhile I like to slip it in to our conversation unexpectedly so if it has been a problem he cant make up a lie. I usually ask him (when he's not expecting it) "when is the last time you looked at porn?" or I ask "when was the last time you masturbated?" I find that when I ask like this at a unsuspecting time he has to answer me honestly because if he hesitates I know he's trying to think of a lie. This is something that has really helped and been effective for us.